The Beckoning of The Holy Spirit
Often, the Holy Spirit speaks to our needs, even when we have no clue what we are looking for. Unfortunately, we don’t always listen or obey. Instead, we turn to things other than God to fill the emptiness inside.
This is what happened to me on a recent spring day. Ironically, during this period of time, I had been asking God why I wasn’t hearing from Him like I had in the past. Oh, the irony! I can just imagine Jesus encouraging the Holy Spirit to be persistent, that I am not always so slow to understand. Thank you, God for not giving up on me!
The Morning I Chose To Ignore The Holy Spirit’s Beckoning
As I write this, I am sitting on my back porch absorbing God's peace; the red ball of the sun has burst over the horizon, a light fog hovers over the farm fields, the birds are calling to each other, and steam gently swirls out of my mug of tea.
Peace is my heavenly gift this morning. But, because of my delayed obedience, my day sure didn't start that way!
My usual routine when my husband heads off to work is to use the early hours of the day for my quiet time Bible study. But not on this day. I was feeling isolated so instead of my usual routine, I put the TV on a local news channel. Since I hadn't listened to the news in quite some time, I thought a quick 15 minutes to catch up with local events would be nice.
It wasn't.
It didn't take but 5 minutes before I began to feel hopelessness and frustration bubbling to the surface. When Jesus walked the earth, there were lots of ungodly ugliness happening (sound familiar?) all around him. He didn't ignore it, but He also didn't give those things control or top priority in his thoughts or allow them to steal away his time. He kept his focus.
So why was I allowing these news stories, purely from a carnal perspective, to feed my spirit and steal my peace? I turned it off.
Maybe I should just read my Bible. There isn't a better way to start the day, right?
On my way to get my Bible, I paused to turn on a Christian radio station. After hearing the hatefulness on the news, praise and worship songs that reminded me of God's goodness and power were just what I needed!
The radio station I chose was too liberal for my taste, so between songs, I turned the commentary down. At one point though, I caught something that made me pay closer attention. I turned the radio up. With increasing bewilderment, I realized that what the DJs were talking about was almost a perfect repeat of what I had been hearing on the mainstream TV station that I had just turned off!
I felt tricked. I'm sure the radio station intended their news to be helpful and informative. One DJ even justified their news updates by saying that knowledge is power. He wasn't wrong, but he wasn't right. These DJs suggested we must know the same things the world knows so that we can be wise and prepared, not foolish or ignorant.
What they forgot was that as children of God, our knowledge and power come from a higher source to which the world's wisdom cannot compare. Instead of giving hope in Christ (Scripture) to counter the mainstream news stories, this station provided the same gloom and doom as the TV station.
Why was I allowing this type of Christian radio station to speak into my life, feed my spirit ungodliness, and kill my hope? I turned it off.
Maybe I should just read my Bible for a bit. The day is waking up, but already my spirit is cowering in fear. I need to find godly encouragement.
A few steps before picking up my Bible, I snagged my iPad. I hadn't checked in on social media in some time. Maybe it would help to be inspired by beautiful biblical quotes and read about the blessings family and friends found. Maybe I could even get off social media without the drama sucking me in.
Nope.
Within minutes I felt sick to my stomach. Christians were arguing with strangers and turning on each other again. This time they weren't defending their right to forgo masks. They were arguing about the latest hot topic. Brothers and sisters were mocking, belittling, manipulating, and shaming each other. I don’t have the most biblical knowledge in the world, but even I knew that Jesus had specifically addressed this particular topic right in His red letter.
Where was the encouragement, the love, the hope, the joy of our salvation? God doesn’t want us to be ignorant of poisonous darts, but we don’t have to help Satan hurt each other! Why did I think rumors of a church awakening and possible revival would be reflected in the fruit of how Christians were engaging with others? With tears in my eyes I turned it off.
Again, the thought nudged me; I should just read my Bible. But the Holy Spirit wasn't done. On the back of that thought was another one that took my breath away; why was I trying so hard to feed my soul peace, hope, and joy from outside God's written word?
And so, as dawn lit the sky, I finally grabbed my Bible and headed for my back porch.
God Knows
Friend, God knew the disappointment and discouragement I would encounter when I chose to disobey his nudges. He knew what I was searching for from each pitstop along the way to obedience. He also knew exactly where He planned to guide me in the Bible to find what I was searching for.
And in His knowledge, God had lessons for me to learn. I don't believe God orchestrated the events of my morning so that I would learn these lessons. I believe He offered me many chances to obey. But when I didn't, He was like, "Ok, daughter. You are determined to do this your way. Let me show you that you can search high and low, but it is only through ME that you will find hope, joy, and peace."
Do you know what else the Holy Spirit showed me through this experience?
That I can't control anyone's actions except my own. Why was I more worried about everyone else when I was clearly disobeying? Intending to obey is not the same thing as obedience!
FOR ADDITIONAL READING: What does it actually mean to obey God?
Sadly, I was wrong about a few things that morning. In my opinion, my biggest mistake was that I elevated Satan over God by giving him a foothold when God was trying to get my attention.
Because He knows everything, God knew I needed to be in His Word, communing with him. He knew today was not a day I needed to focus so much on the carnal issues around me. He knew this morning of all mornings I needed to draw back in, just Him and I.
And so, as I watched the sunrise into the sky, I opened my Bible, uncovered Jesus between the pages, and found the peace, joy, and hope I had been searching for.